i'm so far behind with updating. i'll update a couple of things quickly because i have to get ready for work.

1. a friend on periscope, ruben, prayed for me. he said that he wanted me to know that i am loved. he even sent out a virtual hug. i've been feeling so alone in this life because of my family situation and no dating life to speak of that i'm just not feeling loved nor lovable.

2. i prayed for a lady that called into one of the many credit cards i support. she in turn prayed for me. it was pretty much a repeat of what ruben said but a little bit more. she said that there is no way God can love me more than he loves me right now. he loves me more than i can ever know. she said if i stay on the path that he has for me that i'm going to have a good life.

3. i got prayer last sunday. at this time i forgot most of what she said but i do remember her praying against a spiritual attack and praying for me to trust God.

i've been focused on 'A' a lot lately. my "go to" strategy of calling someone else when i miss him has stopped working. i've been talking to 'A' for 3 days straight and loving every bit of it. we had a heart to heart about some things. bottomline, we are going to agree to disagree. i know what God showed me and i know what i felt. 'A' says that everything he said towards me was genuine. i take his affirmations with a grain of salt.

if anything, i see my interaction with 'A' being the spiritual attack that i'm having reluctant in thwarting.