thank you everyone for the bday wishes! i really had a great bday. it's been the first bday in some years where i've spent it with another person. tiffany made it a point to make sure i had a good birthday. she got me cards and gifts. i'm really fond of the wine sippy cup that says "vegan AF" and a note book with a 3D image of an elephant. we spent the evening trying to make vegan sushi. by the time we were done with everything, we were too tired to eat it. i cut my cake the following day.

i got the results back from my physical. everything is great except for low vitamin D, low iron and low good cholesterol. no issues with low B12. i have concerns about some test for BUN that has been consistently low since i've been getting my physicals. and something else regarding blood levels. i'm going to call and ask them about it tomorrow.

'A' reached out on my birthday. i haven't talked to him in over a year. i missed him. it's strange actually. i talked to him but it's different. he told me about a recent adventure of him dropping acid. he made it sound like such a euphoric experience worth trying but all i could think about were the consequences with playing with something that serious. i looked it up as soon as we got off the phone. he's opening the door to things he has no control over what comes through. he's still even entertaining thoughts of going to peru to experience some type of spiritual awakening with shamans. i do believe when it gets to that point i'm going to have to leave him alone for good. he's playing with demonic stuff and i can't let anything he's dealing with impact me. what's weird is when i went to sleep that night, i kept waking up to noises that weren't there. i keep my phone on do not disturb after 1030pm, but i kept hearing my phone vibrate. then i would hear my phone vibrate. my memories are fuzzy, but i distinctly remember hearing vibrations and other notifications that didn't come from my phone. my laptop was downstairs. there was nothing else that could make those noises so i believe i heard them spiritually. i don't know i have to pray.