on this week of "i'm over it" and a dream.

Saturday, Jul. 17, 2021, 8:26 PM

it has been quite a week.

i'm mentally drained with the sheer ignorance and stupidity that comes along with this position. i have zero doubt in my mind that the educational system is being paid off by banks not to teach basic living skills so that they can produce sheep to be led to the slaughter once they turn 18. lucky me, i have to educate them in a calm voice and not be offended when they lash out at me when they realize their ignorance was not only exposed but also exploited for a price. i.e., an older lady had a 12-month zero-interest promotional plan that expired back in april. she only paid the minimum due to the account for the duration of the plan. well, since the plan expired and she didn't pay it off, she was charged almost $800 in interest. then was shocked that they are charging her $50 dollars a month in interest for not paying off her monthly statement balance. she had the gall to say, "i'm paying off this balance and closing this account." people really say that like i'm going to lose sleep over her closing her account. as long as there are many lambs turning 18 and the educational system continues to do a disservice to our youth, then no one is going to be out of a job any time soon. i actually had a guy tell me i was going to lose my job because he was going to tell 20 of his friends to close his account because he EARNED a late fee.

i really wish our gov't wouldn't focus on wagging their fingers at banks saying they charge too much in interest rates and instead focus on educating our youth on how life works. what happens when they open credit cards, bank loans, student loans, etc. nutrition classes that aren't funded by the meat and dairy industry. basic life skills. sewing a button on a shirt. budgeting food, rent, bills, etc... we do our nation a disservice by throwing them at the wolves for profit.

SIDE NOTE: not that this means anything but it still pisses me off. i had a home-economics teacher in the 7th grade that gave us an in-class assignment that was absolutely ridiculous. she wanted us to make a knot at the ends of a piece of thread by rubbing the loose ends with our thumb and index fingers. the absolute hell. she felt that was a reasonable test. only a handful of students passed that assignment. needless to say the rest of us hated her and her greasy hair.

i had one customer that i wanted to cuss out just for sheer stupidity. i'm not on the phone a good 30 minutes before a customer calls in besides herself with indecision. i made it a simple choice. either we enter a dispute or you call your bank for tracking/resend payment. this was a decision she seriously had to mull over. i'm already annoyed that it's this early and she's so confused so she attempts to take some pressure off of her by asking me where i'm located. i say kansas. then she asks what time is it there. i say 730. and for the love of God why in the absolute hell did she ask, "in the morning??!!" as if it would it took everything in me not to be rude and tell her to get the fuck off my phone. i took a minute to breathe and said yes. she said, well it's almost 830 here. *place eye roll here*...you don't say...

i was really upset about a job opportunity that they handed out to a co-worker. not that i'm not happy for him but i felt overlooked. they offered my co-worker a position mostly off the phones. they selected 32 associates and i wasn't one. i asked what was the criteria. i was told last year's performance. well, i held elite status for the entire year. so what is it. i was told there were a lot to chose from and so they made their choice. but the silver lining is that the new dept has a rigid schedule and it wouldn't allow me the flexibility i need for school. well, there you have it. the new job was gone before i had time to stew in my anger. i had to remind myself or God reminded me "what God has for me is for me". "the steps the righteous are ordered by God". so i have to stop fretting and trust God.

i'm making strides with my past. when i think about 'A' i am more than ever convinced the connection we had is completely severed. that last conversation was so distant it just confirmed it. i just don't have a desire to want him in any facet. i think i am just as flippant and dismissive as he is towards me. #winning #justnotintoyou

i had a dream this week. i saw myself packing boxes. this is at least the 3rd time i've been told to pack. so next week i'm going to contact walmart for the broken down boxes so i can start putting things away. it sounds like i may have to move quickly.

but i'm ready to go. decided to take $15k from an account so i can remodel my bathroom, do something with my kitchen and fix some areas of my house. it might actually take more than 15k when all is said and done. i want out. as soon as possible.

� previous entry next entry �

back to index

on this week of "i'm over it" and a dream. - Saturday, Jul. 17, 2021
some revelations - Friday, Jul. 09, 2021
two entries in two days - Sunday, Jun. 27, 2021
i'm fucking over it. - Saturday, Jun. 12, 2021
finally able to catch up and a dream. - Thursday, May. 13, 2021