so i had a dream this morning. i had a dream that i married prince harry. i was a real princess. it was surreal. someone of royal status adored me and wanted me. to go out of his way to be with me. unfortunately, it's just a dream. not so much that it's royalty but someone.

anyhoo, work sucks. it's been having me down. i'm trying to learn as much as i can with being restricted from the systems that i need to have access and being dismissed by management. it's depressing. i want out. i honestly need to find counseling. i've never had a job that i actually cared about doing. why?! i have a friend at work she feels the same way about her job and she's depressed about it as well. she's actually talking to a counselor.

this fast that i'm on is slow going. i'm still eating out of anxiety. i took progress pics a few days ago and there is no noticeable difference between the pics i took in may. this is a vicious cycle that i haven't been able to break. i've bent it a few times but the cycle always seems to have muscle memory and align itself back to it's original shape.